Sometimes the best thing to do is just cut your losses and move on. I hold this to be true in my business life and personal life, however over the past few months I had given someone a free pass because of certain feelings I had towards her. Now it has become imperative that I move on as it is crystal clear that what I had thought and hoped was just my imagination running wild….so much so in fact that I was doing things out of the ordinary just to have her in my life…
pedestal, geeking out, friendship, love, infatuation, hopes, dreams, soulmate, whatever.
I know this is vague, however, this is something that needs to be squashed once and for all. Something that should have been done long ago, but I was too afraid of losing her from my life because of certain connections that I felt we had, but its pretty clear that whatever connections I felt we had and whatever feelings I have/had isn’t enough to keep trying to pursue something that ultimately is a fantasy. Fucking pedestals.
I sound like a broken record.
Starting with a clean slate all around! no more smoking. working out more. ending this futile attempt and thoughts that I had actually found ‘the one.’ i was kidding myself. she knew it long ago and being the late bloomer that I am, it took me a bit longer to realize that. Totally glad i went to see her this weekend to confirm all this. I guess our end goals are different. I want to start a family. you…beats me…you never answered. Fear kept me from pursuing you earlier, and now fear has kept me from losing you. It doesn’t matter now. One man’s dream doesn’t make it reality. Takes two to tango. Whatever cliche you want to use in terms of how I bungled this whole situation. Sad realization. Wish I had a cigarette. bye jello.
why is this brain fart even online?
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